The last post was an exercise in creative writing and ranting. The reality is: it’s unfair to blame others, or even my job, for what I perceive as a lack of time to pursue art & writing.
Every artist who earns a living from their work understands it requires immense effort and dedication. It’s one thing to have a job where you know what’s expected of you and have a boss who makes sure you do it. Working for yourself is another thing entirely, and I’m slowly learning that if you don’t have a very high level of self-discipline, your chance for success is nil.
Taking an objective (as possible) look at my current circumstance reveals how I respect the boss at my day job more than I respect my “inner boss”. At my day job, I take care to arrive on time, dressed properly, ready to work. How often do I bring that kind of attitude to my personal work? Rarely. Too often, the activities of the day have drained my energy and I’m content to sit back and watch the Daily Show or mindlessly surf the internet.
For a while now I’ve begun to suspect that I need to dedicate a portion of my day to creative activities — and not just any portion, but the beginning of the day, before other activities and inner guilt crush opportunity for creative discovery. This new year, 2010, will be the start of this change. A night-owl by nature, I’ve painfully begun to rearrange my sleeping schedule so that I may rise by dawn, take Brutus for a walk, pour a glass of orange juice, and begin work. So far this schedule has been met with jihadist-strength resistance and sordid success. Yet I believe with persistence this practice will prevail, and once it becomes routine, has the potential to absolutely transform my life.